There are many things that shape people and determine how they deal with life’s challenges. Having been a teacher for 25 years, I witnessed how young people developed as they faced the trials of their early lives.
We experienced this same phenomenon. We learned in our young lives the ideas and principles that shape who we are today. Don Miguel Ruiz, the author of the best selling book “The Four Agreements”, addresses this. He calls these ideas and principles agreements.
He points out that we accept these agreements, oftentimes without question, and let them determine how we conduct ourselves. The problem lies in the fact that these past agreements may not help us move forward with our lives today. He encourages people to consider and live by just 4 agreements:
- Be impeccable with your word.
- Don’t take anything personally.
- Don’t make assumptions.
- Always do your best.
As simple as it sounds to live by these agreements, it can be quite challenging. Your past programming will fight back with everything it has to make you act in accordance to the other 100+ agreements that you have made unknowingly over your past years. Ideas like “I’m not enough” or “an eye for an eye” or “he looked at me in a hateful way” are not going to change easily.
Adopting these agreements may not be easy, but they can pay great dividends. Over the next few weeks, we will consider them one by one in the hope they will resonate with you and help you in your daily lives. For now, consider these questions.
- What challenging situations are you facing right now that involve your relationship with others?
- Are these situations ones that you have faced in the past as well?
- In dealing with these personal challenges, do you find blame, either with yourself or others?
Have a great week!
John Maxwell Certified Coach, Trainer, Speaker, and DISC consultant
Author: Change? Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!?
“They themselves are makers of themselves.” James Allen